Bashing the bishops

In the news today, a group of 40 Anglican bishops have been discussing Bible teachings on homosexuality at the Lambeth Conference in Canterbury. Apparently other topics at the conference included the impending cataclysm of global warming and the ongoing tragedy of world poverty. This, however, was the important stuff. Famine, disease and global annihilation are but small fry compared to the burning issue of whether God wants gays in his club.

Meanwhile, members of the Lesbian and Gay Christian movement held a protest outside, led by professional gay... oops... I mean 'human rights activist' Peter Tatchell. The demonstration reached fever pitch when the protestors unfurled a banner. Yeah, fight the power! Anarchy in the streets!

Traditionalist Anglicans say several passages in the Bible clearly outlaw active homosexuality.

And they have a point. Even allowing for some 'interpretation,' the bible seems pretty unequivocal. Leviticus 18:22 states quite clearly:

Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it [is] abomination.

Mind you, Leviticus also forbids the eating of shellfish (chapter 11), declares menstruating women to be 'unclean' (chapter 15) and gives instructions on sacrificing birds in order to cleanse lepers (chapter 14).

Strangely, none of these things seem to be hot topics with the bishops. But I'm sure once the whole homosexual thing has been sorted out, they'll get right on the abomination that is shrimp toast.

Here's a newsflash for ya, Lesbian and Gay Christians. The church doesn't want you and their book makes it implicit.

So, here's an idea. How about we just ignore the bizarre and seemingly random laws laid down by a 4,000 year old book and accept the fact that none of this has any relevance to how we live in the modern world. The alternative is public stonings for people caught eating lobster bisque.

The news report notes:

... [the] demo was said to have gone largely unnoticed by bishops, who left by a different exit after the discussion.

As opposed to the homosexuals. Who use a different entrance.

Ba-dum, tsshhhhh. Thank you, I’ll be here all week. Tip your waiters.

And try the lobster.